Breaking Up is Hard To Do: Ending Unofficial Relationships

Ending a relationship is one of the hardest things you have to do. It feels like a part of you is dying. The companionship is ending no matter how minute it may have become in recent times, and that’s hard. There is one thing for sure, something has been off for a while now. You know you should end things, but giving up someone that you have feelings for is difficult. You have put so much into it, and you haven’t even made it official. You feel like it could be any day now that things begin to look up, but it’s been months; years even. This article is about breaking up with what never was.

Settling – Summer Walker

Settling is a word often associated with potential in relationships; that can be risky. You see the possibility of a person being what you need. So, you also settle for the possibility of it never happening. It’s essentially a passion project that may never pan out. You are trying to change a person into what you believe they can be, and they may resist that.  A study found that people who didn’t want to be single were more likely to choose less desirable matches. Could your fear of being single overshadow choosing quality matches? If this is the case, it’s high time you let it go.

Let It Go – Keyshia Cole

It’s time to do a sit-down. Whether it is via video chat or meeting at a neutral place; you’re tieing the loose strings of your ending “relationship”. My sister is the queen of gently letting someone down. Start the conversation with something positive about them. This will get the ball rolling is a good direction. Explain why you want to cut things off. Then, end the conversation with kind words if possible.

How Can I Ease The Pain – Lisa Fischer

There are a few ways that will help you move past the relationship once you break it off. Detoxing is highly important. Jill Weber say’s, “the only realistic way out is to stop all contact so that you can start anew.” She also says, “Time away helps positively enhance perspective.” More of her expert opinion can be found in her book,  Toxic Love 5 Steps. Working on yourself is important after a breakup. Taking up a new activity is a good way to take your mind off of the relationship that never was. Also, doing a self-discovery and pursuing self-love is also important in healing.  

It’s all about leveling up and letting go of anything that isn’t making us better. We all have stories of entertaining someone a little too long. The key is that we learn from our mistakes and end the pattern. We are worth the love we give others. The best way to attract the love you so freely give other people is to learn to love ourselves. What advice can you give in getting past relationships that never were? Do you have a story about someone you held on to a little too long? Sound off in the comment section below.

 

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My Ex Watches All My Snaps

Hey Buddies, it’s been awhile. You’ve been searching for answers on Google. Your Ex has been doing something suspicious; you sought out the girl with all the answers. I think I know what you want to know. Let me set up the scene for you. You finally ended things with your ex, or they’ve ended things with you.  It’s been a few months and you noticed that your Ex watches your social media like teenagers watch Riverdale. Every time you post a picture or a video their name appears on the list of people who have watched your story. They’re stalking you, obviously. So, here I am with my cape to give you a playlist of reasons why you’re hunted by the ghost of your Ex.

Want That Old Thing Back – Biggie Smalls

Your Ex misses you. It’s that simple. They are trying to figure out the best way to pop up “just to see how you’re doing”.  They weren’t ready to let you go yet. Or at least they thought they were ready to let you go, and discovered they weren’t. So, here they are stalking you trying to figure out when they should drop in and send you a message.

Case of the Ex -Mya

They want to see how your life is fairing without them. We all leave our Exes with the hope that they are doing horrible without us. We hope that our former significant others can’t even tie their shoes without us. So what’s the best way to know whether the Ex is in despair because we knew they’d be sorry we left? That’s right, stalking. You have to do a little investigative work to know that the Exes life is falling apart.

I Miss You – Clean Bandit

They Miss you, but they don’t necessarily want you back. They like to reminisce about the times you shared together. However, in the words of Taylor Swift “We are never ever ever getting back together”. Sometimes you don’t want your Ex back. You just like to see what they’re up to every once in a while. They are simply just watching you to make sure you are ok. There is no malice, it’s over and they recognize that. It’s just that occasionally it’s nice just to see how an old flame is doing. What is the best way to find out without having to call? Stalk them a little bit.

At the end of it all, if you really want to know why your Ex is perusing your social media you can ask. They may think you’re reaching out; chances are if you want to know then asking why they watch all your stories is an excuse. If not you wouldn’t have taken the time out to stumble upon this blog (wags eyebrows).

As always thank you for supporting the blog.  Unlike your Ex, we don’t mind you stalking us on Social Media. Follow, subscribe, like, comment us on WordPress and our other social sites. If you would like to contribute to the blog, shoot us a message at pinkhairblogger@gmail.com or DM us on Instagram or Facebook! Have a wonderful rest of week. Besos!

I released a short story via Love Journey: Shades of AMBW Halloween

Hey Guys! It’s been a while! How are you (tell me in the comments, lol)? I worked hard on a short story that’s featured in this Halloween themed book. Shades of AMBW Halloween is available on Amazon . Right now we are #3 for Halloween Anthology releases. 44070836_345603936193341_7665348229046730752_n  If you are a fan of Interracial romance or romance, in general, this book would be a great addition to your Kindle collection.  Check it out and let me know what you think! I’m excited to hear about your favorite stories from the book.

As always, thank you for your support. Don’t forget to check me out on Social Media. Please, Like, Comment, Subscribe and Follow. I appreciate you guys more than you know. Besos!

 

Molly from Insecure,…Girl. ***Spoiler Alert***

So, I love Insecure on HBO. I stan it. Well, not literally but I definitely wait all week for it. I was actually watching when it was Awkward Black Girl on youtube from the first episode. So, my fandom runs super deep. The characters have changed a lot, with some cameos from the original cast. However, it remains centered on Issa’s character.  I think besides Issa, my favorite character is Kelly whose real name is Natasha Rothwell. She’s also a writer on the show. Which makes total sense, because she is hilarious.  We didn’t come to talk about Kelly (I’ll save her for a later post), we came to talk about Molly(Yvonne Orji). I don’t usually write recaps, reviews or talk about shows on here but Molly. Girl. You brought me out of my dark blogger’s cave.

Molly. She frustrated me so bad, I had to make her name a one-word sentence. I judged her super hard being in a friend’s with benefits relationship with her open marriage friend. I didn’t say anything though. I just looked the other way. It’s just Molly being Molly. When Andrew came along on this season, I prayed she wouldn’t screw it up. One, he seemed like a nice guy. She’s really good at messing up with nice guys. Secondly, the Interracial community needed this. Thirdly, I didn’t want her to be the professional black woman who couldn’t be happy with a man. We had enough of that with Being Mary Jane (Oh Mary Jane is way worse than Molly, btw). You know what, her screwing things up with Andrew isn’t the only thing I’m side eyeing her for. I kind of saw that coming because let’s face it. It’s Molly. She also stated she wanted a black guy (hey no judgment on that) so I didn’t really see the writers letting this work out anyway. I actually think that they only incorporated Andrew because of Issa Rae’s book, The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl. If you are not privy, there was a lot of hoopla about Issa saying Black women need to date Asian men. It was some other things stated that some people found offensive. Blah Blah Blah. Anywho, I think that was a way to subtly defend herself. Enough with real life.  We’re talking about the fictional characters we are all friends with in our heads, lol.

*****Spoiler Alert*****

Molly went on a second date with Andrew the following day because she had to cut their first date short. She was working on a project with her co-worker (we’ll get to that later. It ties in with her shittiness) and she needed to finish work. They go on the date, and they are joking around with each other (I would like to insert that this date felt awkward from jump…but whatever).  Molly says to Andrew, “Say’s the guy who kissed his homeboy’s girl.”(or something to that effect). He say’s, “Say’s the girl who slept with her married friend”. Feel free to comment the exact words. Anyway, Molly catches a BIG TIME attitude with Andrew and shoots back, “You don’t know the situation.“. She then tells him she’s ready to go and leaves him in the bar/restaurant. Ok, this part alone made me give Molly stabby eyes. She felt like her comment was totally ok to bring up. It was fine that she dug up something he told her to use as a joke. Because men are shitty, I can say what I want. When he brings up something shitty she has done, she gets mad. He’s now at fault. He made a bad joke. I’m upset. How dare he. That’s basically her attitude. Why was she able to say something to him that could be taken as offensive, but he can’t. She can dish it, but she can’t take it. She villanized him and used the “I’m looking out for me” motto over something she created. Molly creates a lot of her own messes. Personally and professionally. She gets in her own way. So far, she appears to be a good friend. She hasn’t messed up in that way at all…yet. When it comes to other people she only cares about her career. She can’t see how her actions lead her to these events. I think she’s terminally blind to it. It’s going to take her falling out with someone important to her. More than likely a friend, for her to realize she is in her own way. I think she needs to have a sit down with her therapist.

Her professional screw up is when she gave that presentation while her partner was away. He was wrong for micromanaging her. It’s annoying to have someone breathing down your neck while you’re trying to do your job. It’s frustrating when a difference in style becomes an error because it’s not how they would do it. I get it. But, to give a presentation that you both were working on alone. That’s wrong. You are essentially taking credit or the bulk of the glory for a project. You had a team member, and you are being a bad team member. That’s something that people who only look out for themselves do. That is also something that makes you not only a bad team member at work but in life. You can’t be a good partner to anyone when you only look out for number 1. Being a good teammate means helping someone up when they fall and working together. Even when it means you will have to share the credit with someone you aren’t necessarily excited about. Speak up for yourself, but that doesn’t mean stabbing someone in the back. I sort of want to Tyra Banks yell at her, because “I’ve never in my life yelled at a girl like this!”. Get it together Molly, “When my mother raises her voice at me like this, it’s because she loves me! I was rooting for you! We were all rooting for you!”. That’s a warning girl. Pull your life together and see your therapist. Figure out why you’re smiling in the wife’s face at the baby shower like you weren’t sleeping with her husband. It is not only his fault. He told you he was in an open relationship with his wife. It is not only his fault that he laid down with you. You let him willingly. You knew he was married. You knew his situation up front. Let’s stop this, “Everyone does Molly wrong. Everyone is mean to me garbage.”.  You’re better than this girl.

Ok, rant over. If you disagree sound off in the comments. If you agree, sound off in the comments. If you want to comment, sound off in the comments. Hey, just comment, lol. Like always I appreciate the support. Don’t forget to follow me, comment, subscribe and like me on WordPress and Social Media. Feel free to e-mail me if you would like a guest blogger/writer spot on the blog. Pitch me your ideas, maybe we can work. Catch me on Green Tea Coffee Date. I blog over there.  Also, look out for me soon. I wrote a short story in Interracial Fiction. It’s super interesting and nothing like you would expect! It will be published in the Halloween edition of the AMBW Love Journey book set to come out October 15th.  I’ll give you more details when it comes out! Love you! Besos!

How to: 3 ways to break up, that are more mature than ghosting.

You’ve met someone online, and you don’t like them. So, you want to pull a little disappearing act millennials like to refer to as ghosting.  It is the cowards way out if you think about it. Instead of telling the intended how you feel (being a mature adult), you choose to become an escape artist. Now you see me, now you don’t. Computers and smartphones have made it even easier to leave someone on read (sidenote: if you have an iPhone they can see you read a message and didn’t respond). Thus leaving them on read, you’re welcome non-millennials.). If you throw in online dating to the mix, you now have a powder keg of communication avoidance. You’ve never seen them face to face, so it’s easier to disregard their feelings. I’m here to improve your online and face to face relations. Here is my playlist on ways to end it rather than becoming Houdini reincarnated.

Say it to my face-Madison Beer

Face to Face is always the way to go for more serious breakups. If you are in a relationship with someone the least you can do to look them in the eye. We quickly forget how things are when the shoe is on the other foot. You asked yourself a million questions. Why has this person disappeared? The cell phone that is permanently attached to your hand becomes a fixture for your eyes. Anytime your phone lights up, you’re hoping it’s from that someone. In the back of your mind, you already know that it won’t be. You’ve likely sent a few more text than you should have and stalked them out of existence online. I’m sure you called them hesitating on whether to leave a voicemail. You start to wonder if your phone is even working. It has been with you a while, maybe it isn’t operating properly after all. Don’t put someone else through these mental Olympics, even if it has become part of our culture.  If you have been seeing someone for a while, even if the commitment isn’t official, end things in person. The closure isn’t just for them. It’s for you as well.

Video Phone-Beyonce

Technology has made some aspects of communication easier. If you are in a long distance relationship with someone, then video calling is the next best thing. Traveling all the way to someone can become expensive. It may not even be necessary if the relationship wasn’t official. Video calling gives you all the perks of face to face. The downside is physical touch won’t be there. If you are breaking up, chances are that isn’t a concern.

Text From Your Ex- Tinnie Tempah

This is the last of your options if you were in a relationship. But, if you have only been corresponding through text it’s perfectly fine. When you haven’t spoken to someone face to face, it’s the easiest to ghost them. I see the allure in it. It’s so easy just to not respond back to a message. You never have to talk to them again. We’re practicing better communication skills people. It starts with the text-only level of dating.  Send a simple message. It doesn’t have to be an sms paragraph. Explain that you don’t see your interactions going any further or that we aren’t the right fit for one another. If they want a further explanation, you can give it to them. If you don’t want to give them one, it would be the time to ask them not to contact you. Ask that they respect that. If they can’t well… Blocked.

Technology is an amazing invention. It gives us ways to communicate if face to face isn’t an option. It also makes it entirely too easy to be a coward behind characters and emojis. Being an adult means to be responsible with relationships as well. Making sure you do the right thing isn’t just for when you like a person. It’s for when you are ready to walk away as well.

I hope this helped hone your breakup skills. If you like post like this, let me know. Leave a comment telling me how you broke up with someone. If you have a crazy breakup story I would love to hear it. As always thank you for supporting the blog. You’ve been patient with the changes going on with the site. Don’t forget to like, comment, follow and subscribe to the blog on WordPress and social media.  As always we are accepting pitches from writers. Send them to pinkhairblogger@gmail.com. Label it, Blog Pitch.  Love you guys! Besos!

 

 

 

MCM: Rotimi aka Dre of Starz’s Power

Welcome to everyone’s favorite Man Crush Monday. So, Rotimi basically makes me wantScreenshot_20180709-230414 to visit Nigeria. Spoiler Alert: He’s Nigerian, lol. I won’t lie, I absolutely hate him on the show. He has his moments when he’s hosting in the club where I remember he’s actually hott in person (he likes to call himself Butterscotch). However, in the show (sorry Dre) he just doesn’t do it for me.

However, in real life… (**fans myself from the heat) he is Screenshot_20180709-230521smokin’ hott. AND HE SINGSSSSSSS. Not like how hott guys say they can sing, but they actually suck. He actually is pretty good at it. So far he’s hott, he can sing and he’s pretty good at acting (because I hate his character…but not him, let’s be clear). I’ve posted him before on my Instagram page because he posted a thirst trap that I could appreciate. Rotimi, you are basically the love of my life and I have a crush on you.

As always thank you for supporting the blog! Don’t forget to follow, subscribe, comment and like us on WordPress and Social Media. We are still looking for contributors. Contact me at pinkhairblogger@gmail.com with your pitch. I would love to hear it.  Check out pictures and lust over him below. Love you! Besos!

 

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Zaddy of the week: Maluma

Maluma is muy caliente and that’s the truth.

It’s everyone’s favorite Man Crush Monday, but I’m a day late. So we now have us a ZaddyScreenshot_20180626-191202 of the Week. Trust me I have a man worthy of your eyes. He’s easy on the eye and he sings. So basically, you’ll want to willingly hand him your panties twice. I think I need Roetta Stone to learn Spanish. Oh did I mention this post wasn’t kid-friendly, lol?

Maluma is muy caliente and that’s the truth. I follow him on Instagram and I feel like I underestimate his finesse from his music videos. I feel like his pictures ooze sex appeal. I’m sure I’m not the only person who wishes he would stop reminding me has a girlfriend. She’s cute, but she’s kind of ruining my fantasy of running away with him (LMAO). If it doesn’t work out, Maluma knows where to find me.

I’ve been eyeing Maluma for awhile now, and I’m glad I have Man Crush Monday and Screenshot_20180626-190859Zaddy of the Week to express my undying lust for him (I’m sure he has a nice personality too, lol). Maluma you soak my undergarments and you make my heart go pitter-patter. In the least raunchy way I know how I want to say, Maluma I have a crush on you.

As always thank you for supporting the blog. Please remember that if you would like to write for My Infinite Playlist or if you would like to pitch me your story to be featured contact me at pinkhairblogger@gmail.com. Check out MidPoint check-in: Switching Gears to get an idea what kind of content we’re looking for. Don’t forget to Like, Comment, Share, Follow and Subscribe to us on WordPress and social media. Check out the slideshow of Maluma below. Love you, Besos!

 

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Midpoint Check In: Switching Gears

At this point, I’ve been running My Infinite Playlist for a little over half a year. I’ve happy turn up GIF by Originals-sourcelearned somethings about blogging, running a site and the direction in which the blog is going.  So far I have seen a little increase in dedicated readership. Which is what I would like. I want the reader who will stay with us through the journey. The passive readers are great too. I’m confident in the content that I create on this site, and I am sure once a member of our target audience experiences the world of M.I.P they will stick around for good.

“We are from all parts of the world and we like to travel the parts we have never been. Women of Color forge into areas that aren’t seen as traditionally ours…”

New Themes:

I realized the true direction I wanted to take this blog. It started off as an interracial blog, wonder woman beyonce GIF-sourceand I would still like to keep that as a topic that we visit. However, I really would like to focus on the overall theme that black women and other women of color are non-monolithic. We are all different, we are into different music, style of dress, dating patterns. We live alternative lifestyles and we are even into alternative forms of beauty. We can be vegan, vegetarian, pescatarian. We are from all parts of the world and we like to travel the parts we have never been. Women of Color forge into areas that aren’t seen as traditionally ours, like beer brewing and tattooing. K-music, J-music, Latin Pop, Afro Beat, EDM, and rock are just some of the genres where we are widespread and share an interest in. We are feminist, traditionalist, minimalist, members of the 1%, political powerhouses, Rap songstresses, and women extraordinaires. We are all of these things under the umbrellas of being people of color and being women. We can be any label we want to apply to ourselves and not just the label assigned to us. We are allowed that basic human right.

“I want to give a different perspective to people who have confined us to a box according to our assigned gender and race. “

Forging Ahead:

source (6)

So in the continuity of this blog, I would like to document those experiences of women. Especially, women of color who are forging in directions that aren’t traditionally ours to be had. I want to give a different perspective to people who have confined us to a box according to our assigned gender and race. We will continue to be all of the sexy millennial fun of man crush Monday, and we will mix it with the radical faces of women who refuse to be labeled.

“I will work hard to stay true to the new vision and direction we’re headed”

Hey You, Yes You. We’re Looking for you!

We are still looking for contributors that share our vision and that can offer a view into giphy (72)the world of women doing things differently. We also want people who can tell their personal experiences and stories of breaking free or living alternatively. I’m excited to share this new direction with you, and I’m thrilled to share a safe space for women of color to be who they are.  As always, thank you for supporting the blog on WordPress and Social Media. I will work hard to stay true to the new vision and direction we’re headed. I love you Playlisters, Besos!

MCM Instagram Crush Addition: @rico_9c

So it’s your favorite time of the week Man Crush Monday and it’s the Instagram addition.Screenshot_20180618-214123 I don’t always crush on the famous. Sometimes, it’s the regular guys and in this case, the Instafamous.  I was minding my own business, doing what I do. Which basically means, I was scrolling through Instagram doing nothing but waste time (lol). That’s when I saw a video of a bunch of uber hunkey shirtless Asian guys and the one I was eyeing happened to be tagged. So, I did what any self-respecting girl with an Instagram account does. That’s right, I started insta stalking him and I discovered that he’s 186cm (roughly 6’1). Also, even though I didn’t understand a word he was saying, his voice was indeed as hott as the rest of him. The man is built to be a literal thirst trap.

 

Some girls like the waif look. The slim with defined Screenshot_20180618-213934muscles thing is cool and all. As in, if your personality and a decent height ( I’m a tall girl) is all there then I would probably give you a chance if you’re attractive. However, a nice muscular body will make you me stare you down a hallway with my body facing left and my head facing right any day. We’re talking the exorcist head spin (kidding, I actually turn my body around too because it’s the proper thing to do). This guy would definitely make me turn all the way around to watch him walk away (any fries with that shake? *wink wink). Because I’m generous, I will leave a slideshow below. I may learn Korean just to slide in his DM’s.  Who knows I may end up with a hott Korean boyfriend across the pond (if he’s not taken I got dibs). Anyway, @rico_9c I have a crush on you and now all of the interweb knows it.

As always, thanks for supporting the blog! Don’t forget to like, comment, follow, subscribe, and share on WordPress and social media! Love you to pieces Playlister’s, Besos!

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